Swissiness As Usual

Things have begun to slow down for my aging self in this 90sqm apartment close to the positively fascinating center of Zurich. And yes, I had to point out that I am aging and I have two new wrinkles to substantiate that bizarre claim. Since when do I get wrinkles? This must be some sort of practical joke that isn’t very humorous and if the joke spreads even further I’ll be pursuing legal action against the responsible party. Is it gravity... or could it be Europe and the price I paid today for a small Chai Latte? Whatever the cause, the area under my eyes is off limits!

The temporary corporate apartment is less than 1,000 sf. which, in California, is the type of dwelling we call ‘chicken coop’. I shouldn’t complain (and I’m not) especially since my brother lives in a sardine can in NY. I don’t mind the size at all. On the contrary, I enjoy how little time it takes to clean the entire apartment. That’s right—there are no Marias here. It’s all me baby. I’m also contented to forget the lazy, tired feeling I used to get just thinking about walking from my bedroom to the kitchen or even worse—the kid’s bedroom back in the mansion (by comparison) in California.

Appointments have trickled down to just a few per week on our house hunt, aka ‘mission impossible’. Doesn’t anyone in Zurich ever leave? The rental market here is best described as: you take whatever you can get; you thank your lucky stars that you even got that; and then you shut up and love it. That makes me totally psyched about finding the place I end up having to shut up and love!

Even my job search has almost halted. Not only do the Swiss surgically attach themselves to their apartments but they also don’t like hiring me. By ‘me’ I mean an inexperienced employee with no work permit or any language abilities outside of English (like every other human here) and Arabic (I may as well speak Martian). Despite my shortcomings on the resume side of things I know I’m a hot commodity and if they’d only agree to meet me in person they’d agree. What would also help is if they posted the damn job openings in English! Martian will do too.

So, like me, you’re probably asking yourself, “What the hell do you do with your severely constipated self now?” Well, I’m trying to figure that one out.

That’s it really. Where you expecting an answer right away? Don’t hold your breath, I’m still working on it. Maybe the ideas will come in tandem with my bowel movements... pray for me.