Every day in Zurich seems to have its ups and its downs. There are good moments and then there are times where my daydreams involve various types of weaponry meeting the inside of my body. Clearly I’m being over dramatic but what’s a good blog without action and drama? Honestly if I were to day dream about doing violent things to myself don’t you think I would opt for something a bit less messy? Who would clean up the blood off the floor and wall after I’m gone? As the saying goes, “it ain’t gonna clean itself”.
My mood is despondent today. It’s safe to assume it falls on the violent daydream spectrum of days. I’ve lost my phone and there are so many people I want to talk to but can’t. Losing the phone has awoken feelings of loss that are much deeper than meets the eye. It sparked a homesick feeling and the reality of my move has finally set in. The excitement of Europe and the business of moving had me numb. I’m painfully, slowly accumulating feelings that I should have had before leaving California. I miss my friends and family. I miss them dearly and I want them to know they filled up my life and now there’s a void I’m looking to fill.
I almost made two new friends today. I tried my very best but I’m no good at these things. I sparked the conversation and kept it going with two complete strangers in a store. We all know that goes far beyond my usual capabilities. They were very nice women who were also expats. One was from Holland and the other was French and I was on quite the roll until it came time to take the conversation to a pre-friendship level. Would asking for an email address have killed me? I left with nothing!
I won’t use your real names but I make a habit of befriending smart people so guess who you are...
I want to call Yomama before she gets any angrier to clarify to her that when I say, “I love it here and want to live here forever”, I really mean, “I don’t want to live anywhere but where she is.”
I want to call Shoosh and ask her about her move and her man. And to ask her how on EARTH she recovered from losing her phone! I want to tell her off for S. Carolina giving its vote to McCain.
I want to call Beelou to see how she’s doing and how the heartbeat sounded. I can tell that kid’s going to be a hottie. And to tell her not to move to the East Coast because Basel needs her more.
I want to call Arwa and tell her I miss her a lot! More than I thought I would (no offense! Haha) I was just so excited about moving that it didn’t hit me just how much I’d miss everyone. I miss her crazy comments and her bad moods when the kids are driving her crazy—which seems to be how I feel all the time now. I need you to be my neighbour here too ok? Yalla bring Bubu’s after school playground buddy and come.
I want to call Minnie and ask her how she’s doing and that I think about her all the time. I hope she’s doing well. I want to hear how her house updates are coming along.
I want to call Nura because I miss her a lot too. I want to thank her (if she voted) for helping Obama win Michigan’s vote. I also never got the dish on her buddy and the famous dude.
I already called Dodo but our phone got cut off mid conversation because our home phone line sucks, always has and always will. It was still really comforting and nice to talk to her. I wanted to tell her that I miss Rodo SO much and I feel like I will always have this special bond with her because of the days she spent with Bubu before she moved. I loved them and I grew so attached to her. She’s a sweetheart, masha Allah.
I wanted to call H-dawg to wish him a Happy Birthday and he just sent me his number today so maybe I’ll call him Monday.
I want to call Nivvy just to hear stories about M&M being cute. And to see how her family is doing. I’m tempted to come back to CA for a visit just cuz I get to see them wallahy and for Bubu to see the M’s.
I want to call Yomama’s mom because I never got to say goodbye to her! I feel so badly about that. I love her. She will always be Bubu’s nana.
I want to call Izz because she just had her baby! Crazy times are ahead for her.
I’ve been trying to call pops but he never answers his phone! Yours is the only number I actually have memorized.
There are more but I’m tired. It’s 2:30am. Good night.
Update: Sak! I didn't forget about you I swear! I logged in to edit this post in the morning just for you. Here goes...
I want to call Sak because she's the craziest person I know. Plus she's really, really tall. I want to remind her that she promised to visit us soon and that all her hard work earning Bubu's love has gone to waste because Bubu has already forgotten everything.
